It's a ........!!

Friday was the day that Erik and I went to get our ultrasound! We found out the sex and that it does not have 3 arms, which seemed to really please Erik, because he mentioned it at least a couple times. I'm sure you really want me to just spit it out and tell you already, "Boy or Girl?!?!?," but not so fast. Let me just say that for a couple months now, I was totally convinced it was a girl, and have been calling the baby "she;" however, Pam, my mom-in-law was sure it was a boy. Pam was right, I was wrong. It's a boy! I was actually so genuinely surprised, I made the tech go back and check, multiple times, because I wasn't convinced. With this picture, I realized there was no mistake. It's official, I have a penis inside me. Weird.

The concept that we are going to have a son, has just started to sink in. Erik kept thinking I was sad or upset to find out it was a boy, but really it has been hard to accept that I was so wrong with my instinct. For some reason, I feel like I should have known. Before I had a "feeling" about what it was, I felt totally non-biased about what we wanted, I would've been thrilled with a healthy baby of either sex. Then, I got myself all worked up and convinced I knew what it was! I am not disappointed in any way, I am just adjusting the visions I had conceived in my mind and am trying to accept that it's OK that I was wrong. I am somewhat overwhelmed with the idea of having a boy, because I don't know what to do with boys, I know girls! I feel like raising a responsible, sensitive guy is scary, and I keep thinking of all the stuff in our backyard that he'll be able to turn into "weapons...!" On the upside, Grandpa Dennis and Erik will have another generation to suffer with through Cubbie and Bear seasons. Let the tradition continue!! While Grandpa Bob and I have many lessons of tools and building to instill in the first male of our clan (that is if Tasha doesn't have a boy first).

So we find out it's a boy, and then the tech does a scan of the baby for measurements and to show us his face, and he is SO cute!! I'm sure I'm somewhat biased, but seriously, what's wrong with you if you don't think he's adorable?!
I know that looking at these images takes a little adjustment to figure out what is going on, but hopefully you see his little face amongst all the "stuff" that he's floating in.



Now I see his face and am totally falling in love with the alien inside me, even though it has a penis, then he does more cute things, like yawning. I find myself grinning ear to ear, in total disbelief and amazement that we are looking at OUR baby. Wow, crazy....

And look at his sweet profile.... Erik actually said, "Hey, maybe he won't have my Cro-Magnum brow! Maybe not, but honey, there's still time....

I am really glad we went to find out what we were having, even though we debated a bit about whether or not to do so. Knowing what we are having, hasn't "spoiled" the surprise in any way, in fact it's given me a whole new perspective about how to be a mom and what I might face. Besides, there are plenty of surprises in our future. In a few short months (that will feel ridiculously long at times when I am waddling around), we will have officially left our pre-children life, forever. We are excited and nervous, hopeful and scared. Life will change in every possible way, but we know each other quite well after all these years, and are glad that we get to go through this experience together. On Friday, it felt like we met our son for the first time, and now I have an image of his face to get me through the rest of my pregnancy and labor. I feel a sense of peace and anticipation of meeting him in person, face to face.